7 steps to ultimate self love for better health
Updated: Feb 18, 2019
Self-love is a term that often gets tossed around in conversations: “love yourself”, “you can’t love someone until you love yourself first”, “practice self love” – but what does it mean? Today, we share 7 easy steps to rock self love - despite and beyond illness.
What the heck is self love anyway?
To practice self love we first have to define it, right? Self love can be defined in different ways. What does self love mean to you personally? Here's my take on it:
Love is gentle. Love is kind.
Love moves you forward – not holds you back.
Love warms your soul.
Love makes you feel alive.
But here’s THE TRUTH.
Love starts in you.
Not in someone else.
Not in the fairy tale we get sold on Valentine’s Day.
When we are kind to ourselves, we become kind to others. Self love isn’t selfishness. Self love is freedom – the freedom to be uniquely you. Self love is taking your power back. Self love is turning inwards before we turn outwards. Self love is so much more than feeling good about yourself. Self love is ACTION. ⠀⠀
7 steps to ultimate self love
Ok now I hear you say: it's all very good in theory but what does self love mean in practice? And, let’s face it: it’s easier to love yourself when things go according to plans, right? If you're reading this blog, chances are your health has been challenged in some ways and when we feel angry or let down by our bodies it's easy to feel overwhelmed. Here are 7 easy steps to get you well on your way for your self love healing journey.
1. Self love is a choice
Like happiness, self love isn't about a fairy striking you with the superpower of feeling good about yourself. Self love is a choice. Self love is action.
2. Self love starts with self awareness
Now you're ready to take action - where do you start? Cultivate mindfulness. Pause throughout the day to check in: how do everyday events impact on how you feel about yourself and the people around you?
The more you pay attention to what you think, feel and want, the clearer you will be about who you are, and the more your actions will tend to reflect YOU - rather than what is expected of you.
3. When self love means tough love
Self love favours the bold. It's so easy to find ourselves caught up in what feels good in the moment, right? Sometimes we can lose sight of what we need; we find ourselves stuck in a bad relationship or unhealthy habit. Step back, focus on what you need, and learn to protect yourself from people or situations that are toxic in your life.
4. Self love: practice makes perfect
Practising self love is all about nourishing yourself - the way you eat, move, sleep, play and work but also how you relate to other humans - the way you socialise, connect, love, touch, hug, kiss, and share intimacy. This week, try creating your own self love ritual - soaking in a warm bath, massaging an injured area of your body, trying a yoga class, seeing a friend for coffee - whatever feels good to your mind and body.
5. Self love is learning to say NO
Setting boundaries doesn't come naturally to everyone but I promise you there's nothing like the feeling of saying no without explaining yourself - it's exquisitely liberating! Don't get me wrong, saying YES to life is a wonderful thing but self love means also standing strong against the things that drain you of your energy or harm you in some ways.
6. Forgiveness powers self love
Have you ever told this advice to a friend: "stop being so hard on yourself"? Now, it's time to practice what you preach! Learn what you need to learn from the past, accept that you are a human who makes mistakes, let go of perfection, and move on. As long as you grow, there are no mistakes - just lessons learned.
7. Self love transcends in purpose
Our emotions can reveal clues that lead us to our purpose. What drives you? What makes you angry? Even if you're unclear about your purpose right now, you can set an intention and start living your life in that direction. Two years ago, I kicked off the New Year with this intention "surrender to love and peace". This simple intention helped me mend a broken heart and make the right decisions to live the life I want. Fulfilling our purpose or intentions is very empowering - it will make you feel good about yourself.
Now you see that self love is so much more than a buzz word we hear on social media - it requires a choice and it takes practice. Start wherever you are, be kind to yourself and remember health (and self love) is a journey, not a destination!