How to identify and crush limiting beliefs - Day 7
Updated: May 1, 2019
Self-limiting beliefs are the worst; they stop us from being our best self. To wrap up our 7-day Crushing Limiting Beliefs Challenge, Dr Lisa Martin, a brilliant sport and performance psychologist, shares how we can identify and break free from the beliefs that stop us from achieving what we want to achieve.
What are self limiting beliefs?
To wrap up our 7-day Crushing Limiting Beliefs Challenge towards ultimate self-love, I had the pleasure of interviewing Dr Lisa Martin, a sport and performance psychologist who coaches elite athletes on how to break free from the beliefs that stop them to perform at their peak. Dr Lisa is also a lecturer at the University of the Sunshine Coast and one of the amazing humans behind my PhD!
Today, Dr Lisa takes us on a journey to become aware of our limiting beliefs, understand where they come from in our lives, and take that very first step to set ourselves free.
Day 7: top 3 limiting beliefs
If you're still unclear about what a limiting belief is, here's Dr Lisa's take on it:
A limiting belief is a core belief that constrains you in some way and stops you from achieving what you want to achieve.
When I asked Dr Lisa what are the common limiting beliefs that she encounteres in her work, here's what she had to say:
There's lots of them as you know with this challenge - the most commons are: I'm not worthy, I'm not good enough, and I'm unlovable - especially I'm not good enough.
Sounds familial? That's because we heard similar beliefs on Day 5 when talking to our guest on the other side of the world! Let's see how we can break free from those beliefs.
Day 7: Step 1 breaking free from limiting beliefs
Ok, so where do we start? Dr Lisa said that the first step is to identify what beliefs we want to change in order to grow:
What's really important is the identification of our limiting beliefs, talking about them, and exploring them with the right questions - because we're all very negative in our mindset as humans that we can think about all the things that support our beliefs but we don't necessarily think about the things that challenge them.
Dr Lisa said that the negative patterns in our lives are often the first clue that something need to change:
What usually is happening is that those patterns are going on in our lives and we're experiencing the same thing over and over again and wondering why.
How can you apply this to your own life? Well look at your reaction to certain situations. For example, if we tend to back off when things get hard because we feel like we're going to get rejected - this can be a clue that there's a limiting belief underneath,
Day 7: Where do limiting beliefs come from?
The most common place is from direct past experiences - a lot of those can be in childhood and they're even more ingrained when they've come from a traumatic situation.
We act, something happens and we draw conclusions.
In human behaviours, we look at stimulus and response - we either get rewarded for something and we do it more often or we get punished for something and we do it less often.
Our brain is wired to keep us safe, so our harmful experiences can give birth to new limiting beliefs. In the same way as we may have learnt not to touch a hot stove by first burning ourselves.
When we shape our view of the world, we learn from our parents, teachers, and peers on how the world works and how to behave in it. But they are not always right. Sometimes we have to experience the world for ourselves - if we just hang on to the beliefs or experiences of others we fail to learn, grow and develop our own view of the world.
3. Faulty logic
Our decisions are not always based on sound logic. When purchasing a car, we may read hundreds or positive reviews but hear of one bad experience from a friend and that car suddenly goes straight to our black list despite having all the features we're after. These decisions could be based more on fear than actual reality.
How often do we make excuses for doing or not doing something based on our beliefs or our fears? For example, if we do something and it doesn't work - rather than learning from our mistakes we often justify our lack of action. But sometimes, our fear of failure or our image of self worth stop us from giving it a go in the first place.
Limiting beliefs are often driven by our fears. Again, the fear of rejection or the fear of making a fool of ourselves is often enough to stop us from moving forward. Repeating to ourselves "I am safe" can help us overcoming the fear that we ought to be harmed in some ways.
That’s it for Day 7. I hope you enjoyed the challenge! Stay connected for more ways to reach ultimate self love and how to love your body after cancer.